07/06: my spaced
ok. so we're moving info over to myspace, so I thought I'd just make this easier on my and do my blog on my space. ok? so starting soon, my blog will appear on http://blog.myspace.com/heidecker
22/05: Robin Williams
here's a story. Last night I was asked to be the monologist for Assscatt, UCB Theatre's Sunday night improv group. basically, my job was to get a suggestion from the audience and weave it into a story. then three improv guys created a bunch of scenes based on my story. It doesn't sound great, but it's actually really funny. For that sort of this. So I did well in the first half, I told my stabbing story and it was well received. We're back stage during the intermission and all of a sudden who comes back but Robin Williams! He's crazy and I'm sort of in shock. He was watching the first half and loving it and decides he's going to go up in the second half and improv. So I go back out and tell another story, which is bascially, hey, I just met robin williams. he keeps inturrupting me and pretending to stab me in the back. he was really funny, crazy, genuine and seemed to just love being silly. As much as we goof on him, it was honestly pretty cool to be around him.
18/05: 9/11
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5137581991288263801&q=loose+change
17/05: brain. hurts. must scratch
ugh. I've been so discouraged to write because of all that spam on the comments. can anyone do anything about it? anyway, I'll try to keep pushing along. June 4th is fast approaching and new promos for season two are starting to be released on adult swim and will surely make their way onto tgttm.com. also, new yorkers, LA-ers, Chicago-ers and Atlana-ers can look forward to Tom Billboards!!! We're psyched for sure and will be taking lots of pictures.
12/04: Return from the motherland
Sorry, I've been quiet. We just go back from philly. It was a great show. Friday night we showed about 45 minutes of brand new material, I sang a song, Eric and I played a live game of Billy Williams and timpromptu...doug did a set. What didn't we do?
I was great to meet some of the people who post on the boards too. I was more of you were there. shame.
I'll think of something funny to write for tomorrow.
I was great to meet some of the people who post on the boards too. I was more of you were there. shame.
I'll think of something funny to write for tomorrow.
04/04: Me Make new Friends
Have you heard of the BBC show "Look Around You?" BBC America is currently running it's second series and the first series can be found by searching "look around you" on google video. It's just about my favorite comedy of the past several years.
So we were recently introduced to the "chaps" who are behind the show. Bloody brilliant!!! Turned out they were fans of TGTTM. It was really like meeting out English Dopplegangers.
here's another thing. look at this picture of Jeff Goldblum in the scandelous March issue of Playboy Magazine! Look! He's wearing our Cinco hat!!! I'm sort of in Playboy magazine (that's my bald head in the picture on the hat.)
Philly's coming up soon. I'm really looking forward to it. I hope to see lots of you there.
brock.
PS. Oh, PS. I'm going to see the Borat movie tonight. full review tomorrow!!!!!!!!
So we were recently introduced to the "chaps" who are behind the show. Bloody brilliant!!! Turned out they were fans of TGTTM. It was really like meeting out English Dopplegangers.
here's another thing. look at this picture of Jeff Goldblum in the scandelous March issue of Playboy Magazine! Look! He's wearing our Cinco hat!!! I'm sort of in Playboy magazine (that's my bald head in the picture on the hat.)
Philly's coming up soon. I'm really looking forward to it. I hope to see lots of you there.
brock.
PS. Oh, PS. I'm going to see the Borat movie tonight. full review tomorrow!!!!!!!!
God bless America. Land that I love. Stand beside her, and guide her through the night with the light from above:
buy now
buy now
27/03: Hey Folks, Hey Gang
the above subject line is a reference to an upcoming episode featuring fred armisen. I can't wait for you all to see it.
I'm good. goodish. I got the stitches out today. Do you have insurance? I do, but I was referred to this doctor. Dr. Boris Something-or-other...No one spoke very much English. I felt like I was in another country or something.
But the good news is, I can take my bandages off tomorrow and actually take a normal shower.
I want to thank everyone again for all their kind and funny words. Now let's get back to the nonsense.
The greatest,
Alexander
I'm good. goodish. I got the stitches out today. Do you have insurance? I do, but I was referred to this doctor. Dr. Boris Something-or-other...No one spoke very much English. I felt like I was in another country or something.
But the good news is, I can take my bandages off tomorrow and actually take a normal shower.
I want to thank everyone again for all their kind and funny words. Now let's get back to the nonsense.
The greatest,
Alexander
23/03: The Full Story
For the record, I've written my official version of the story for use in light conversation or mass emails. mostly to curb the rumors. it's kind of long and contains the words "shit" and "pee."
I am fast asleep Thursday night when my neighbor J-- wakes me by pounding frantically at my door. J--'s son, a college freshman, whom I know well, is apparently in some danger. She's very upset and is asking me for help. She's called 911, but was worried that he was going to kill himself or that he was dying... Her exact words escape me as I has just woken up and am trying to find some sweatpants in my heap of clothes. She keeps calling me, telling me to hurry. Finally, I dash out and up the stairs into their apartment, expecting to find him unconscious or out of it. But when I call his name, he responds with a very violent, guttural growl; RHAAAAHGH!!!!!!! which immediately tells my brain to tell my body to run back down the stairs, quickly. I look behind me at the bottom of the stairs to see him coming fast behind me holding an 8-inch butcher's knife. The kid is a lean, 6 ft. 2, i'd say, probably in much better shape than me. Yikes.
My bare feet are hardly touching the ground as I head a block west to the corner of Sunset and Fountain where I hope there might be people. I head towards Tang's Doughnuts, which is a 24-hour haven for local bums and lowlifes. I almost run inside, but it dawns on me in a split second that there are only two small Chinese girls working the late shift and I could possibly corner myself by running in there. So I keep running. and screaming. I run around some cars in the parking lot where the lowlifes are hanging around and I hear and see them back away from us, not wanting to get in the middle of the chase. I hear them say "knife!" And I think it's here when my ears tell my brain the I am in fact being chased with a knife. That I am not dreaming. I bolt across Sunset to the McDonald's. I try to open the door but it's locked. Closed. An image from Ghostbusters flashes in my mind, when Rick Moranis' character is being chased by the dog-beast and ends up outside at the Tavern on the Green beating on the window while people watch, then return to their dinners. The kid is now halfway across the street, slowing down a little bit, I think, but still on my tail.
I turn to my right and spot at the end of the block, Akbar, a gay bar, with a good sized crowd of men standing outside the door. I run inside the bar screaming bloody murder, straight behind the bar, past the bartenders. The kid comes running in after me, but is brought down by the guys in the bar. I felt there was a moment or two of chaos, where the people in the bar didn't understand what was happening and I didn't feel safe yet, but someone yelled "knife!," and that brought more guys to subdue the kid. Someone then told me that I was bleeding. I looked down to my hand which had blood on it. It became clear to me that I had been stabbed.
I had and still have no memory at which point along the chase he cut me. but now I was bleeding and I could feel my back become warm. A lovely pre-med student came behind the bar and took my shirt off and put a bar towel on my bleeding back. She tried to calm me down and assure me that the cut was not that bad, but I began to panic and worry that I was dying. The owner of the bar came back to calm me down. I called out for my girlfriend who was at my house asleep when I left to go get stabbed. She was allowed in to the bar as the cops had shown up with paramedics who eventually got around to examining me. My back began to become very sore and stiff and I could feel the warmth of my blood running down my back. I could see the bloody knife a foot away from me. I looked at my girlfriend, winked that I was OK and then pretty much lost it.
I see them take the kid away in cuffs and I hobble out to the ambulance with some gauze holding the wounds (I now am told that I've been stabbed twice! Great!) my girlfriend goes back to my house to get my shoes, my wallet, my phone...enough clothes so that i will never have to go home again...
A short ride to the hospital. A revolving door of cops, interns, nurses and adminitrators all come to ogle at my wounds. "oh shit" most of them say. I'm given shots, stitches, morphine, my girlfriend comes in. I'm crying, she's crying. I'm feeling sore and scared. The doctor says the cut looks ok. he's pretty sure there's no internal damage. he takes me down the hall to take a CAT scan to make sure my lung wasn't punctured. It's painful to go from the gurney to the CAT scan table. Movements are awkward. I'm feeling the morphine, I'm in a plastic tube with warm dye running through my veins. I feel like I peed myself.
I'm wheeled back to my curtained room and I see the sister of the kid who stabbed me, who's also one of my closest friends. she's in the hallway waiting to see me. She cries, I cry. She's apologizing and I tell her I understand. We all sit in the curtained room, crying and trying to understand what happened, which we now have a much clearer understanding of:
It is most likely, that the kid had bought a bag of pot which was laced with PCP. If you don't know what PCP can do to you, look it up: http://www.streetdrugs.org/pcp.htm. It's some pretty scary stuff and explains his violent irrational behavior. The kid and I were friends. Two nights before I had given him a ride down the street. There were no signs of violence. He was a good kid.
By around 4 in morning, I realized it was late enough on the east coast to call my parents in Florida. I had a deep fundamental desire to hear my parent's voice. I started off with, "First of all, i'm ok. I'm fine..."
Later, more painkillers. Something wonderful called Dilodin which made my face hot and everything wonderful and sleepy. Finally an X-Ray to ensure there were no internal injuries missed and I was discharged with a prescription for vicodin.
Is there more? Not really. I spent the next few days on my back (stomach) recovering and letting my girlfriend take care of me. She's the best. I would be much worse off without her. Thank her for me from you.
in the end, I feel bad for the family of the kid. I know that he didn't intend to hurt me. He didn't even remember the incident happening when he was told what happened. I was caught peripherally in a much more damaging and complicated story which will get worse before it gets better, I'm sure. Please keep him and his family in your thoughts.
If you've made it this far, thanks again. See you all real soon, I hope. Love, Tim
Here's the route of my daring escape:
and here's me all stitched up a few days later:
I am fast asleep Thursday night when my neighbor J-- wakes me by pounding frantically at my door. J--'s son, a college freshman, whom I know well, is apparently in some danger. She's very upset and is asking me for help. She's called 911, but was worried that he was going to kill himself or that he was dying... Her exact words escape me as I has just woken up and am trying to find some sweatpants in my heap of clothes. She keeps calling me, telling me to hurry. Finally, I dash out and up the stairs into their apartment, expecting to find him unconscious or out of it. But when I call his name, he responds with a very violent, guttural growl; RHAAAAHGH!!!!!!! which immediately tells my brain to tell my body to run back down the stairs, quickly. I look behind me at the bottom of the stairs to see him coming fast behind me holding an 8-inch butcher's knife. The kid is a lean, 6 ft. 2, i'd say, probably in much better shape than me. Yikes.
My bare feet are hardly touching the ground as I head a block west to the corner of Sunset and Fountain where I hope there might be people. I head towards Tang's Doughnuts, which is a 24-hour haven for local bums and lowlifes. I almost run inside, but it dawns on me in a split second that there are only two small Chinese girls working the late shift and I could possibly corner myself by running in there. So I keep running. and screaming. I run around some cars in the parking lot where the lowlifes are hanging around and I hear and see them back away from us, not wanting to get in the middle of the chase. I hear them say "knife!" And I think it's here when my ears tell my brain the I am in fact being chased with a knife. That I am not dreaming. I bolt across Sunset to the McDonald's. I try to open the door but it's locked. Closed. An image from Ghostbusters flashes in my mind, when Rick Moranis' character is being chased by the dog-beast and ends up outside at the Tavern on the Green beating on the window while people watch, then return to their dinners. The kid is now halfway across the street, slowing down a little bit, I think, but still on my tail.
I turn to my right and spot at the end of the block, Akbar, a gay bar, with a good sized crowd of men standing outside the door. I run inside the bar screaming bloody murder, straight behind the bar, past the bartenders. The kid comes running in after me, but is brought down by the guys in the bar. I felt there was a moment or two of chaos, where the people in the bar didn't understand what was happening and I didn't feel safe yet, but someone yelled "knife!," and that brought more guys to subdue the kid. Someone then told me that I was bleeding. I looked down to my hand which had blood on it. It became clear to me that I had been stabbed.
I had and still have no memory at which point along the chase he cut me. but now I was bleeding and I could feel my back become warm. A lovely pre-med student came behind the bar and took my shirt off and put a bar towel on my bleeding back. She tried to calm me down and assure me that the cut was not that bad, but I began to panic and worry that I was dying. The owner of the bar came back to calm me down. I called out for my girlfriend who was at my house asleep when I left to go get stabbed. She was allowed in to the bar as the cops had shown up with paramedics who eventually got around to examining me. My back began to become very sore and stiff and I could feel the warmth of my blood running down my back. I could see the bloody knife a foot away from me. I looked at my girlfriend, winked that I was OK and then pretty much lost it.
I see them take the kid away in cuffs and I hobble out to the ambulance with some gauze holding the wounds (I now am told that I've been stabbed twice! Great!) my girlfriend goes back to my house to get my shoes, my wallet, my phone...enough clothes so that i will never have to go home again...
A short ride to the hospital. A revolving door of cops, interns, nurses and adminitrators all come to ogle at my wounds. "oh shit" most of them say. I'm given shots, stitches, morphine, my girlfriend comes in. I'm crying, she's crying. I'm feeling sore and scared. The doctor says the cut looks ok. he's pretty sure there's no internal damage. he takes me down the hall to take a CAT scan to make sure my lung wasn't punctured. It's painful to go from the gurney to the CAT scan table. Movements are awkward. I'm feeling the morphine, I'm in a plastic tube with warm dye running through my veins. I feel like I peed myself.
I'm wheeled back to my curtained room and I see the sister of the kid who stabbed me, who's also one of my closest friends. she's in the hallway waiting to see me. She cries, I cry. She's apologizing and I tell her I understand. We all sit in the curtained room, crying and trying to understand what happened, which we now have a much clearer understanding of:
It is most likely, that the kid had bought a bag of pot which was laced with PCP. If you don't know what PCP can do to you, look it up: http://www.streetdrugs.org/pcp.htm. It's some pretty scary stuff and explains his violent irrational behavior. The kid and I were friends. Two nights before I had given him a ride down the street. There were no signs of violence. He was a good kid.
By around 4 in morning, I realized it was late enough on the east coast to call my parents in Florida. I had a deep fundamental desire to hear my parent's voice. I started off with, "First of all, i'm ok. I'm fine..."
Later, more painkillers. Something wonderful called Dilodin which made my face hot and everything wonderful and sleepy. Finally an X-Ray to ensure there were no internal injuries missed and I was discharged with a prescription for vicodin.
Is there more? Not really. I spent the next few days on my back (stomach) recovering and letting my girlfriend take care of me. She's the best. I would be much worse off without her. Thank her for me from you.
in the end, I feel bad for the family of the kid. I know that he didn't intend to hurt me. He didn't even remember the incident happening when he was told what happened. I was caught peripherally in a much more damaging and complicated story which will get worse before it gets better, I'm sure. Please keep him and his family in your thoughts.
If you've made it this far, thanks again. See you all real soon, I hope. Love, Tim
Here's the route of my daring escape:
and here's me all stitched up a few days later:
what cha gonna do?
Thanks to everyone who sent nice things or said nice things on the message board. I am being well tended to by my lady and my mom. I tell ya, it was by far the scariest thing that's ever happened to me. I'll give a more detailed post about the events in days to come. love to you. Timbo.
Thanks to everyone who sent nice things or said nice things on the message board. I am being well tended to by my lady and my mom. I tell ya, it was by far the scariest thing that's ever happened to me. I'll give a more detailed post about the events in days to come. love to you. Timbo.
